Yesterday was my sweet sixteenth! But on the contrary, it wasn’t overly sweet. The fact that exactly 16 years ago, a doctor in New Delhi, India, pulled out a small sickly white wailing thing out of my mother’s uterus resulted in me getting a little extra attention than I usually do everyday. It started of sloppily- I woke up early to a new alarm, Nights by Avicii at 6:30am and exercised, showered and put on my new deodorant and went down to breakfast earlier than usual-but not a single soul wished me. I silently cursed everyone in the room and sat quietly in class. Our teacher told us to answer some question on google classroom and I fidgeted quietly in my seat waiting for something to happen.
Praise the lords, Facebook existed. My three friends were magically reminded and this guy exclaimed, it’s the birthday of someone on this table today! I replied sarcastically, “indeed it is”. And that kind of sparked it. My day went well from there and people began wishing me; I even got my own birthday video!
I’ve been thinking about how much I’ve grown since I was born and how I’ve celebrated my birthday throughout the years. Those days, I’d see something attractive at the stores-a chocolate bar, barbie doll or jump rope, spend hours deciding which one was most attractive and go with it. I never looked at the price; my parents took care if that. Today at school, my sociality, sleep schedule, grades, and personal achievements determine my happiness. I constantly need an event from the present or future to give me hope. I hang on to every smallest word he says and over analyse it. I’m looking forward to the winter holidays when I can eat at an indian restaurant, basketball club or going to the supermarket; that’s what motivates me.
i’m doing my best to keep up hope and practice what’s healthy for me and the community. Most of all, keep my emotion levels stable and not get angry or sad too fast.